Gold Star Mother Makes a Mission to Honor Her Son

By Michele McNaughton, the proud mother of SSG James McNaughton, KIA 08/02/05

This Sunday, September 28, is Gold Star Mother's Day. It is a day for people to recognize and honor those who have lost a son or daughter while serving in the United States Armed Forces. It is the Department of Defense who declares you a Gold Star Mother. This is a small part of my story on how I became a Gold Star Mother. 

Gold Star Mother, Michele McNaughton

In 1996, my son graduated high school and left two days later for boot camp. Jimmy joined the Army to become a Military Police Officer, which is a five year commitment.  He went overseas in 1999 to Germany, Kosovo, and Bosnia.  In 2001 he was honorably discharged and I was overjoyed to say the least, but he stayed in the Army Reserves.  He then joined the New York City Police Department. His Academy class was known as the 9/11 class, the longest Academy class in the History of the NYPD, instead of six months they did nine. Due to 9/11, they were taken out of the Academy to help with different details.

Ok so now you must be asking why am I telling you all of this. In 2002 my son was activated for his first deployment. At the ceremony the families were asked to tie a yellow ribbon around a tree at the Reserve Center and then we were handed a Blue Star banner. I never knew what a Blue Star Mother was, but I learned then. I was excited and came home and told the rest of my family and then went to look for other banners to buy and give to my family to display proudly. We proudly hung that banner in the window while Jimmy was deployed.

Jimmy came home safe from his deployment and we took our banner out of the window. In 2004, Jimmy was activated again for his second deployment.  We took out our Blue Star banner and again proudly hung it in the front window.  He left on December 26, 2004 for Iraq.  He came home on leave in June of 2005.

Blue Star Banner (L) & Gold Star Banner (R)

On August 2, 2005 Jimmy was killed by a sniper in Bagdad, Iraq. That is when my Blue Star turned to Gold. My son was the first NYC Police Officer killed in Iraq, and his funeral services were huge (I myself being a NYC Police Officer as well as my husband who had just retired from the NYC Police Department). There was a Suffolk County Police Officer that spent nine hours trying to find a Gold Star banner to give to us to hang in the front window.  


One of my missions as a Gold Star Mother is to volunteer. My personal motto is “To never forget a past, present or future Veteran, as I am the voice for those that cannot be heard from and the voice for those that haven’t found theirs yet."  I also believe in education.  Most people don’t understand what a Blue Star or Gold Star Mother is. My car license plates are Gold Star Mother plates and sometimes people will make a remark and I will respond, but I always add, “Now that you know, please pass it along and teach someone else.”

Just because I’m a Gold Star Mother doesn’t mean that my son is the only hero. My belief is that everyone that steps up to the plate to protect our great nation is a hero.  

Most people don’t know what to say to someone who lost a child while in defense of our country.  So when I am given the opportunity I let everyone know that it's okay to ask about our children, how they lived, how they died.  It helps me and most parents to be able to share their stories. It keeps them alive.  


To sum it up, as a Gold Star Mother I feel that it is my duty to stand honorably in my son’s place. I need to finish his mission and help to make sure other Military members are not forgotten.  I also believe that it's not just the mother's responsibility any longer, it's the family.  I believe in Gold Star families as we all had a hand in our children's lives.  

May no more Blue Stars turn to Gold, but if they do I will stand beside them. God bless America!

Golfing Communities Bring in Big Support

Hope For The Warriors is proud of the two very successful golfing events this month: The Inaugural Semper Cool Golf Classic in Central Valley, NY and the Scarlet and Gold Invitational in Wallace, NC. Service members, supporters, and special guests attended these two unique events and we thank everyone for making these occasions memorable and their impact long lasting.

Special mentions for the Semper Cool Golf Classic go out to co-host, author, and veteran Barry Fixler of the Barry Fixler Foundation, as well as actor, veteran, and military advocate Dan Lauria, and the Falkirk Estate and Country Club.

Special mentions for the Scarlet and Gold Invitational go out to River Landing, Food Lion, 1-800-Pack-Rat, as well as athletes and celebrity hosts Johnny Bench and Doug Flynn and magician and comedian Michael Finney. 

#tbt Tunnel to Towers 2010

This Sunday is the Tunnel to Towers 5K Run & Walk, which honors the heroism of fireman Stephen Siller. On 9/11, 34-year-old Stephen Siller had the day off, but when he heard about the first plane hitting the World Trade Center, he ran through the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel on foot with 60 pounds of equipment. Stephen ultimately lost his life helping those in need, so his siblings started the Tunnel to Towers 5K Run & Walk as a tribute to his selflessness. 

For years, Hope For The Warriors has participated in the event, demonstrating our commitment to the sacrifices of so many service men and women who lay their lives down for our safety every day. More information on the Tunnel to Towers 5K can be found on the Stephen Siller Tunnel to Towers Foundation website. 

Dean & Taryn's Ride Across the USA

We are awe-inspired when supporters decide to creatively advocate for our military, and the story of Dean and Taryn Hatcher is no exception! Starting on September 8, this father-daughter duo has been cycling from Blaine, Washington to Key West, Florida to raise awareness for Hope For The Warriors®. 

Dean and Taryn's Cycling Route

There will be many updates along the way about their journey, so stay up to date and follow Dean and Taryn on their Facebook page. 

To learn more about how you can support Dean and Taryn's ride, visit their fundraising page here.

Thank you for your amazing support, and best of luck, Dean and Taryn!

#tbt Harmon Meadow Run For The Warriors 2013

Join Hope For The Warriors® this Sunday, September 21 in Secaucus, NJ for the 4th Annual Harmon Meadow Run For The Warriors, a 5K and 1-Mile Walk/Run in memory of Army SPC. Rafael A. Nieves, Jr. For more information on the run, please visit the race site. See you there!

Motorcycle Clubs--Continued Support

Hope For The Warriors® has the privilege of receiving phenomenal support from many different communities across the country. We are always amazed by the big hearts of people looking to bring attention to and answer the call of giving back to our military families. We cannot even begin to describe how much we appreciate each and every supporter, including those who lead their community to awareness. 

One group that has provided countless support to Hope For The Warriors® over the years is that of the motorcycle community. Like a snowball effect, we find that each motorcycle group we encounter drives another—no pun intended--to our community of supporters. 

The real benefit of these groups is that they actively engage in any activity or project we present them with. Their eagerness to try new activities and get involved in unique ways sets them apart. Their energy and persistence make them invaluable.    




These are several motorcycle communities that have been involved in the Hope For The Warriors® mission over the years. We thank them on behalf of the service members and military families they’re impacting every day.

Rough Riders Motorcycle Club Combat Vets Of America Patriot Guard Rebels MCLeathernecks Motocycle Club
Grand Rapids Wart Hogs





Cold weather is beginning to hit many part of the country and motorcycles will be put away for the winter soon.  However, the impact of their support continues throughout the year. Thank you to all of those who have supported and continue to support our military families.

Turning Pain into Power: A Wife Remembers her Husband

By Denise Olsen

Wife of a fire fighter lost on 9/11 and a member of our staff

It has been 13 years since our country was attacked.  13 long years filled with ups and downs. My husband, Jeff Olsen, was a NYC firefighter.  He was stationed at the firehouse across the street from the World Trade Center and was lost that day. He was 31 years old.  We had 3 children—Vincent: 8 years old, Tori Rose: 3 years old, and Noah: 18 months old. I could barely breathe. The pain of my broken heart was actually physical and I had no idea how I would survive.                                                    

He was and is my “why" and in 13 years, I have learned. I have learned that for every bad person in this world, there is a hero.  I have learned that faith and hope are sometimes all you have. I have learned that you need to allow people to help you and love you--it heals them, too. But most importantly, I have learned that pain is a powerful energy. 

We don’t always get to choose what happens to us, but we get to choose how we handle it. In honor of my husband’s life and the lives of all those who were lost that day and in the years following 9/11 until now, I have chosen to turn my pain into power.  I choose to celebrate their lives instead of focusing on their death. I encourage you to do the same; be grateful for the love you shared even if it was for just a short time. Find strength in their strength. Never give up hope. Always remember, they live forever through us...

I read this passage today and I am including it because I couldn't have said it better myself:

Grief can destroy you—or focus you. You can decide a relationship was all for nothing if it had to end in death, and you alone. OR you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you dared to recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so you just lived, just took for granted the love and laughter of each day, and didn’t allow yourself to consider the sacredness of it.  But when it’s over and you’re alone, you begin to see that it wasn’t just a movie and a dinner together, not just watching sunsets together, not just scrubbing a floor or washing dishes together or worrying over a high electric bill.  It was everything, it was the why of life, every event and precious moment of it.  The answer to the mystery of existence is the love you shared sometimes so imperfectly, and when the loss wakes you to the deeper beauty of it, to the sanctity of it, you can’t get off your knees for a long time, you’re driven to your knees not by the weight of the loss but by the gratitude for what preceded the loss.  And the ache is always there, but one day not the emptiness, because to nurture the emptiness, to take solace in it, is to disrespect the gift of life.
--Dean Koontz, Odd Hours